Top 100 Hilarious Valentine’s Quotes Guaranteed to Bring Laughter!

Spread love and laughter this February 14th! According to Parade, while flowers and romance are nice, the real gift is making your loved one chuckle. So, along with the chocolates, share one of these hilarious quotes on Valentine’s Day.

From clever observations about relationships to witty one-liners, these 100 quotes promise a good laugh. Let’s dive into the humor of love!”

1. Charles M. Schulz compares his love to a timeless sentiment, highlighting the enduring nature of affection.
2. Tracy Smith humorously depicts a unique Valentine’s Day celebration.
3. Lewis Black humorously remarks on the holiday’s effect on those without a partner.
4. H. L. Mencken offers a witty take on the perception of being in love.
5. Anonymous humorously reflects on Cupid’s accuracy in matchmaking.
6. George Burns amusingly compares love to a backache.
7. Michael Scott from The Office humorously expresses his desire for both love and fear.
8. Faye Morgan humorously comments on the social dynamics of Valentine’s Day.
9. Henny Youngman humorously plays on the idea of paying a hefty price for love.
10. Jim Gaffigan humorously suggests that without Valentine’s Day, February would be similar to January.
11. Chelsea Peretti humorously comments on the interpretation of text messages in modern relationships.
12. Melanie White humorously remarks on the effort of choosing a Valentine’s card.
13. Dolly Parton humorously suggests a solution to marital longevity.
14. Jenny Han humorously twists the notion of falling in love.
15. Dr. Gregory Houser humorously prioritizes the importance of oxygen over love.
16. David Sedaris humorously suggests that honesty can sometimes be avoided in relationships.
17. Mike Primavera humorously finds solace in nature during Valentine’s Day.
18. Friedrich Nietzsche humorously suggests a cure for lovesickness.
19. Lucille Ball humorously recalls her slow-burning romance.
20. Tim Allen humorously hints at the distraction love can bring.
21. Dax Shepard humorously hints at the challenges of marriage.
22. Bridget Jones’s Diary humorously reflects on modern dating dynamics.
23. Chelsea Peretti humorously repeats her observation on interpreting text messages.
24. Unknown humorously simplifies the complexity of relationships.
25. Paul Valery humorously defines love as shared stupidity.
26. Richard Jeni humorously suggests that deception can foster a successful relationship.
27. Plato humorously equates love with insanity.
28. Phyllis Schlafly humorously compares marriage to pantyhose.
29. Mindy Kaling humorously defines true love through karaoke.
30. Rita Rudner humorously finds joy in marital annoyance.
31. Oscar Wilde humorously questions the necessity of love.
32. W. Somerset Maugham humorously critiques the biological imperative of love.
33. Faye Morgan humorously comments on Valentine’s Day social dynamics.
34. Jimmy Fallon humorously suggests an unconventional Valentine’s Day gift.
35. Melanie White humorously remarks on the effort of choosing a Valentine’s card.
36. Unknown humorously finds solace in food on Valentine’s Day.
37. Oscar Wilde humorously suggests the enigmatic nature of women.
38. Unknown humorously juxtaposes love in sports and life.
39. “Pretty Woman” humorously hints at a successful date.
40. Joan Crawford humorously compares love to a dangerous fire.
41. Lily Tomlin humorously questions the role of love.
42. Albert Einstein humorously dismisses gravity’s role in love.
43. Socrates humorously offers advice on marriage.
44. Cher humorously reflects on impulsive decisions in love.
45. Garry Shandling humorously suggests a paradox in intimacy.
46. King Jaffe Joffer humorously compares love to nausea.
47. Woody Allen humorously reflects on the symptoms of love.
48. Tim Allen humorously suggests a symptom of love.
49. Charles Schulz humorously defines love through popcorn.
50. Cameron Esposito humorously acknowledges the practical benefits of marriage.
51. Garry Shandling humorously reflects on intimacy.
52. Chelsea Handler humorously jokes about family introductions in relationships.
53. Albert Einstein humorously compares the expectations of marriage.
54. 30 Rock humorously defines love through concealment.
55. “The Office” humorously reflects on the desire for love and fear.
56. Pauline Thomason humorously compares love to blindness.
57. Jerry Seinfeld humorously compares marriage to comedy.
58. Fran Lebowitz humorously questions the sustainability of love.
59. Jerry Seinfeld humorously compares men’s needs in relationships.
60. Hussein Nishah humorously comments on the pricelessness of love.
61. Charles Dickens humorously suggests anonymity in Valentine’s greetings.
62. Will Ferrell humorously suggests a modern compatibility test.
63. Freud humorously ponders the mysteries of women.
64. English Proverb humorously questions the role of doctors in love.
65. Nora Ephron humorously advises on marriage.
66. James Thurber humorously defines love through shared experiences.
67. Agatha Christie humorously suggests the allure of age in love.
68. Unknown humorously compares a loved one to essential comforts.
69. Unknown humorously jokes about the cost of love.
70. Unknown humorously finds comfort in the familiarity of love.
71. Jackie Mason humorously comments on infidelity.
72. Chico Marx humorously interprets a romantic gesture.
73. King Jaffe Joffer humorously compares love to nausea.
74. Lucille Ball humorously suggests the futility of guessing a woman’s age.
75. Ray Romano humorously describes the perks of marriage.
76. James Garner humorously compares marriage to military service.
77. Steven Wright humorously reflects on psychic abilities.
78. Rodney Dangerfield humorously jokes about his appearance.
79. Pearl Bailey humorously contrasts love with paperwork.
80. Bill Maher humorously critiques women’s choices in men.
81. Billy Crystal humorously comments on the differences in sexual motivation.
82. Jacques Torres humorously compares relationship longevity to phone battery life.
83. Melanie Griffith humorously defines the power of love.
84. Helen Rowland humorously comments on marital disagreements.
85. Carroll Bryant humorously compares love to a construction project.
86. Unknown humorously expresses affection despite appearances.
87. Zsa Zsa Gabor humorously comments on the transformation of love in marriage.
88. Unknown humorously celebrates enduring affection.
89. Kathy Mohnke humorously compares marriage to dietary supplements.
90. Dwight Schrute humorously expresses affection in a unique way.
91. Fernando Pessoa humorously compares love to a tangible indulgence.
92. Cathy Carlyle humorously defines love through control dynamics.
93. Unknown humorously flirts with the idea of love at first sight.
94. H. L. Mencken humorously compares love to war.
95. Sixteen Candles humorously reflects on the intensity of crushes.
96. Unknown humorously imagines an unconventional Valentine’s Day.
97. Jules Renard humorously compares love to an hourglass.
98. Ralphie May humorously weighs the benefits of being right versus being happy.
99. Unknown humorously compares love to a dream and marriage to reality.
100. Unknown humorously acknowledges the routine of love in marriage.

Source : Parade

https://parade.com/986706/marynliles/funny-valentines-day-quotes/?utm_source=pushly